Monday, November 1, 2010

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Monday, October 25, 2010

7 Months

Dear Scarlett,
What a week. I started work last Monday, and Aunt Lizzie took over as your nanny and main slobber receptacle. You did a great job together and I barely worried about a thing, except how much I missed seeing your chubby little face. But even that wasn't too big of an issue because I was incredibly busy right away, and because you are just down the hall during the day, so you helped me send some emails between naps.



Aunt Lizzie is documenting all of the things you do during the day, which include: Getting A Tooth! (Tuesday), taking all of your toys out of their cradle and then rocking the cradle back and forth for many, many minutes (Friday); taking Rigby for a walk (Thursday), and Getting Another Tooth! (Friday). You rarely cry or complain, and I can't tell you how relieved I am that this is working out so well.

It's good to be back at work. I missed the kind of interaction I have with my clients and coworkers, and I think it was the right decision to return to my job. By mid-day Thursday, though, I was having major withdrawal symptoms, and had to hold you for a while. You were happy to see me, and unfazed when I left again.



When I'm done working, we get to play together for a while, and then you take a nap and eat your dinner. Right now your favorite foods are sweet potatoes, peas, and squash. You are slowly beginning to tolerate avocado, but would rather smear it on your face than eat it.

You turned 7 months on Saturday and posed for pictures in your watermelon dress.



You have been blowing raspberries and spitting all over everyone and everything. This gets really messy, but makes me and Dad laugh a lot. You love to roll around in our bed and chase the cats, and I have to be very quick around you now, or you will have Smokey's tail in your mouth as you dive off the edge of the bed. Dad calls you a bruiser, because you are always kicking and scratching him. I try so hard to keep your nails trimmed, but a few days ago you woke up with a face full of scratches that made it look like you had napped with Edward Scissorhands. I have seen babies with longer nails than yours, but you will grow just the slightest edge of a nail and immediately feel compelled to wield it like a weapon. Dad has a cut under his eye to prove it.

I have always loved our time together, but I am really appreciating it now that I'm back at work. On Sunday, Dad and I went to a concert with Aunt Lizzie and Rob. We were gone all day, and you had your first babysitter who isn't related to us. I had a great time at the show, but missed you a lot. When we came home, the babysitter said you had barely eaten, so I took the opportunity to go into your room and feed you. You opened your sleepy little eyes and saw that it was me and the face you made was the best thing ever. You missed me, too.

I love you,
Mom

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Friday, October 15, 2010

Back to Work

Dear Scarlett,
Today is my last day of maternity leave. I can barely believe it's been almost 7 months. It makes me think back to the day when you were 5 weeks old and Nonnie left and Dad was at work and you and I were home alone, just us, for the first time ever. I was so happy that day, but also scared. Now I'm not scared to be alone with you. It's just me and you so much of the time. We take walks and go grocery shopping, you crawl around on the floor in the kitchen while I cook and clean up. We play in your room with your music table, read books, sing songs...I know that going back to work doesn't mean we can't do these things anymore. But I still feel like something amazing is coming to an end.

I'm excited to go back to work, too, which leaves me feeling a little guilty and sad. I feel ready to have more adult interaction and some different kinds of challenges. But I know that soon the stress of work will creep back into my life and it won't be something I can turn off just because office hours are over. I worry about that getting in the way of our time together, time when I just want to be enjoying our family. When I was pregnant with you, and thinking about the labor and delivery, it helped me to think about the fact that women have babies every day. Now it's helping me to know that women with children go to work every day, and most of them probably don't have a situation as nice as mine: a 7-month leave, working from home, my sister as your nanny, done at 3pm. It's really a good arrangement, but it doesn't leave time to snuggle with you in the morning, to feed you peas at lunch, to put you down for naps. I am going to miss those things so much.

The end of maternity leave is not the end of motherhood, it's true. It's just the end of maternity leave. But right now, that feels pretty big.

Love,
Mom